Have yourself a Merry LIttle Christmas

Still continuing to practice guitar. What a beautiful song. A little slow in parts next year it will be even better. :-)

When push comes to shove

What an adventure. House hunting, house finding, house inspecting, finance approving, negotiating...phew! How can a person want to sell their house but do nothing to work with the person who wants to buy the house. I'm not sure how I feel about this adventure and what lessons it brings. Most of all I'm disappointed. There is a reason realtors are a part of real estate transactions. There are emotions attached to the structures we call home. Strong emotions. Those of a life lived and those of a life planned. So where do you draw the line? When do you decide to say no. For some it is right away. They know exactly how far they will go (or not go) and they stick to it. Others analyze, weigh it out, make a decision and bit by bit come to a conclusion that feels best. I would say realtors have a hard job. I'm glad to have many realtor friends and have a new respect for what you do. It is a rare occasion when a patient comes into my office and doesn't want to follow the treatment plan but wants to feel better and when that happens... I tell them my office is not a quick fix stop it takes time to heal the tissue and gain rehabilitation from the stress that caused the changes in their body creating inflammation and pain. I help them fit their healing desires into their lifestyle. Sometimes its a compromise. Sometimes they have to go elsewhere to get a more aggressive treatment. Sometimes we do a little of both. Correspondingly when selling a home a seller can set their bar and stick to it. This is the experience we just had. The sellers would not budge on... anything and had unrealistic goals. We finally decided to call time of death when they would not even address safety issues such as radon, lead pain, and minor faulty wiring. Really???
I tried to gain perspective... looking from their point of view. All I could gain was... it was time to move on. We were not the buyers for this home... and that is okay because there will always be another house and I strongly dislike feeling taken advantage of. So... bye bye house may you do well in your future with the current owners because it seems as if they are pretending they want to sell.

When push comes to shove. Get out of the way and let the person shove against themselves and the obstacles they create. Simplify.

OH LA La

I'm sure most can relate to being a care giver and not being able to take the discomfort away from a loved one. I hear this from patients in reference to their parents, partners, and children. This past week was a meditation in just being a companion through a journey of healing. Fiona's body did all the right things... fever, vomiting, swelling, redness. All we could do is be with her. Rock her back to sleep, rub her belly, and give lots and lots of hugs. It was a challenge to keep my fear in check as to what could be the cause. Sometimes because of my training in physiology and biochemistry it is easy to list out all the possibilities and not have the reasoning to rule the obvious far-out-there options due to the fact that it is my daughter who is in discomfort. The pricelessness came in having the skill set to examine her nutrition points and check for her needing an adjustment daily. One day it was her low back that needed adjusted, then her C1 vertebra (common when fighting a virus), and also her upper back. Throughout the week her URT stress point flared up, then her SPL stress point (both are different immune points), then her challenge stress point (constipation due to so much sweating from the virus and some vomiting.). I could watch her body work through fighting. What an amazing feat our bodies go through daily to maintain homeostasis.
Today she is on her second nap (as she requested... she says "bed") and has asked for some solid foods as well as a couple back to back episodes of Daniel Tiger. (We just ordered her a Daniel Tiger T shirt from PBS. I'm sure she will want to wear it EVERY DAY!!!
It is a challenge to be with a loved one who is fighting, healing... as we all are in varying degrees everyday. Sometimes in the office patients get better very quickly... sometimes it takes more time, more diligence, more work... sometimes we can only get so far. What a life lesson. One to be practiced over and over. Enjoy the now. Kiss your children. Open your heart. Be patient. Smile. Breathe.

For my mental health I most often turn to a book titled "Not so Big Life" and read wherever it lands me. Today my take away is.

 One of the most difficult skills to develop is the ability to say no

when you know that's what the situation requires. 

When you listen to what your body and your intuition are telling you

and when you slow down a bit so that you can be more engaged, 

tasks that seemed stultifying when you were overtaxed can reveal

themselves to be of a very different character. They can be stimulating 

and enthralling when you are well rested and in a more peaceful state of mind

and thus in a higher or more open state of being. It's not the task that is the problem;

its the speed at which you are trying to do it and the lack or presence as you engage.

Nothing is worth jeopardizing your health for. Nothing.

-Sarah Susanka

So today... the dishes need done, the tub cleaned out, laundry folded, grass mowed, toys picked up, food supply replenished. However, none of that is going to happen because today we are going to recoup. We need naps, we need snuggles, and we need each other. Family.

New TV (journal entry)

This morning our T.V. died. Its been on the blink for the past week and today we played taps on the bugle horn for it. We've had that T.V. for a very long time. When we got that T.V. Jesse told me for... oh at least 6 months he was researching T.V.'s and waiting for the right sale. Finally the day came. We went to two different stores... best buy and... Fry's maybe. Anyway, We went back and forth between the two stores twice and he still was asking me... do you think its the right one. I rolled my eyes and thought of my poor husband with his analysis paralysis.
So... back to our T.V. that died. I thought in my mind. Oh no! Its going to take him forever to find one. I don't watch a lot of T.V. but... I like watching cartoons with Fiona and a show or two with dear hubby. (Depending on what we have DVR'd)
Surprise surprise he narrowed it down to two only took... about two hours of research and when asking me if we should get it...(from amazon) I pushed the checkout/place order button and that was that. Ta Da! Replacement T.V. shall arrive shortly.
It crossed my mind perhaps I could be the most excellent wife ever and order an in home sound system. However, the budget in my mind was $200... and apparently (after searching for 15-20 min (much less than my chosen partner :-)) that number is quite laughable. So...we'll hold off on that one.

In other news we are getting closer to the "find a house" timeline. Yay!!! Exciting. We'll be looking for a well constructed outdated ranch just north of where we are now or perhaps a condo in broadripple village. We will see what is available when the time comes. What we do know is that we don't want to be far from the monon, broadripple village, or my practice. We do want to be in a neighborhood, and have 2-4 bedrooms. I'm hoping for something we can develop into  Atomic Ranch as we get the funds but is functioning well now. I can take yellow wallpaper and green bathtubs. :-)

Miss Fiona is not a baby anymore. She is a full on toddler. She has a great personality... until she uses my own stubbornness against me but, this is just karma coming back from my childhood. ! She's a lovely little lady who likes to eat rocks, dirt, pour out her bottle while telling herself "no no no",  yell Hi to just about everyone she sees in the store or out and about, and gives me kisses when say "Fiona, I love you." :-x

In my music house I am quite the zen girl. Self lead guitar still kicking and singing with Bahama Llama. I just ordered a capo and some guitar picks for the first time ever. I've got several songs I can play... slowly. Skinny Love, Ho Hey, hallelujah, sunshine, landslide... :-). Jesse and I are going to see "The Tallest Man on Earth" at the vogue in a couple weeks. Super pumped for that. Better believe I'm fixin to get a t-shirt!  

Love and light,
H
                                    

Mother's Day!

When Fiona was first born I sang her this song. She is an amazing lady. I have many loved ones who have children of their own and those they love deeply. Children bring light to our lives and laughter to our hearts. Enjoy this first recording of my new skill guitar playing and singing. (2 weeks in) Recorded during naptime Mothers Day 2013.  

The upload wasn't done right so the sound is off. Can't fix it because little Fiona just woke up! Have a great day!

Love and Light,
Heidi

Music

I have a family history of musicality from my fathers side of the family and passion from both sides. My personal history includes piano lessons that my dad traded landscaping with the local piano teacher for, first chair french horn in middle school, singing throughout highschool (which I didn't get over my stage fright fear until college) at many wonderful weddings and I took a beginning guitar class in college (with a very cheap guitar that couldn't hold its tune. My teacher said it belong in a fire. LOL)

I miss singing. Its a part of me that needs nourishing. Those of you who have experienced this outlet of creativity can attest that you know when its lacking. You know when its time to fuel that part of your soul. However, my rock and roll band days are done. I don't want to devote the time to commit to meeting with other musicians. I don't want to subject my body to smoky bars. I find myself longing to sing :-) childrens songs. What I want... I want to play the guitar and sing to my little girl. I want to see her twirl and dance and jump and sing with me. I want to write her a song to tell her about the world and the joy she brings to it for me. I want her to hear and feel my love surrounding her through music.

Next order of business.

1. Get a guitar. (affordable :-))
2. Learn to play said guitar.
3. Continue step 2... forever. LOL.

Photos are of a couple bands I was in from college. Ahhh memories. Good times (except for the playing til 4 am (waiting to get paid til 5am... class or work the next day and ears hurting from speakers being so loud.)

Have a wonderful Saturday!

Running

Spring Fever has ignited a running passion in at least half of the patients coming in.

Its very exciting to be part of such a health minded community. Running isn't the only exercise of course but it does lend itself to be easy to take up.

Cheering on our patients who are headed to Boston in a couple weeks as well as those who are training for their first Indianapolis Mini. Exciting to finally feel the spring happenings cycle in.

Of those who come in the most common mistakes are.

1. Not staying hydrated.
2. Not stretching at all.
3. Too much too fast.
4. Wearing really old shoes to run in.

Catch the Spring Training bug and go for it!

I haven't run since before my pregnancy. I jogged... maybe twice but didn't stick with it long enough to get the good... I love running feeling. There is nothing like that feeling even with cycling or yoga... its different. Each practice has their own... in the moment zen feel. You know it if you run and you don't get it any other way if you don't. I'm looking forward to enjoying the better weather by getting out. 
Cheers!